I have a newborn baby who is nursing well. My four-year-old son suddenly has renewed interest in nursing again. I agreed to let him try it out one time, expecting that he'd giggle and then forget the whole notion, but he has asked to try nearly every day since then. I have told him what a big boy he is and pointed out all of the things he can do that the baby cannot, yet he still seems fixated on being allowed to nurse. He self-weaned a year ago and I really don't want to reestablish our nursing relationship- sweet and wonderful as those days were. Any suggestion on how to handle his repeat requests?-Anonymous
5 comments:
My son has requested to nurse a few times and I have always been told that you should let them try it and they generally lose interest after trying it once or twice.
I offered to let my son nurse and instead of nursing he just kissed the nipple LOL. He hasn't asked since them.
I have 4 children, nursed them all. I also have a lot of friends who nursed as well. I know there is a lot of debate on the issue of when to stop nursing, but I strongly feel that once a child is eating solid food it is time to stop nursing. And most definatley when a child can climb into your lap and lift your shirt and want to nurse...its way past nursing time. My youngest son is not quite 4 yet...and very smart. I know I could not imagine nursing him!! He eats steak for cryin' out loud!! I feel nursing past the age of 18 months personally disgusting. And the very few people I know that have nursed longer regret it long term. It is definatley not any benefit to the child, and in fact keeps them very much "babies", I realize it is more of a "mommy can't let go, and let their child grow that is the biggest problem! I would never let any child over the age of 2 "kiss", "touch" or drink from my breasts! Do you realize how curious kids are starting around the age of 3-4 with the human body? From my own experience and speaking for many of my nursing friends...let it go. When new baby comes or you just decide its time to move on to another phase of life...then don't allow the regressive behavior. And don't feel guilty about it either. Think about how absolutly crazy it would be if you were out in public and saw another child the size of most 3-4 year olds playing away and then want to climb in mom's lap for a drink?!
Actually, there ARE still benefits of breastfeeding a 2 year old. For someone who has nursed 4 children you don't seem to know a lot about the benefits of extended nursing. If it's not for you, that's perfectly fine...but to insinuate that it's disgusting is rather rude and insulting. How would you feel if someone told you that nursing your newborn was disgusting? You would probably be offended because you know that breastfeeding is best for your baby and it's what breasts were made for...same goes for after your "cut off age". It's recommended everywhere that you exclusively breastfeed for 6 months and continue breastfeeding for at least a year and beyond if it's still mutally possible for you and your child. There's no indication that once a baby is on solid food, breastfeeding should be stopped. People continue formula feeding after babies are on solids, so why would you think that you should stop breastfeeding when breastmilk is even better for babies?
Here is an excellent link on the benefits of extended nursing:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html
To the original poster: if you don't want your 4 year old nursing anymore he is old enough to explain to him and for him to understand that his younger sibling needs Mommy's milk now to make baby big and strong like he is. Keep reinforcing that Mommy's milk is for babies and he is a big boy now. He's probably wanting to nurse to be close to you again because he's feeling a little left out by you spending so much extra time with the baby. Maybe try and set aside some more time with just him and he'll adjust.
PS Kudos to you for nursing for 3 years!
I'm gonna have to agree with anon # 2. I think that it is people like you anon #1 who deter people from doing what is natural for their children. With all the sex in your face in today's media, it's no wonder that people look at a woman's breast as a sexual object and not what it was initially intended for.
Mother of 4 responding...I actually do know a lot... or should I say have read a lot on the benefits of nursing longer, however; as with anything you'll find "authorities" on both sides. Ones that recommend and ones that do not. And as far as rude and insulting...done in private is one thing but in the company of anyone else I would think nursing a toddler to be rude and insulting! As to someone saying nursing a newborn is disgusting...I have heard that quite a few times actually. Mothers that would not even think of nursing because of the sexual stigma attached to a woman's breasts. To each their own. However; I also had my children on regular milk by 18 months, or earlier...and solid foods, so contrary to a lot of "authorities" today... if they eat a well balanced diet then they are substantially nourished!
Post a Comment