One For Young Moms

The majority of today's first-time moms are 30 to 35 and getting older. It seems that women are now reorganizing their life accomplishment priorities and children are falling last on the list below college or university degrees, careers, marriage, and home ownership. This new order of things seems to be creating a negative opinion towards younger mothers, leaving them frowned upon and less respected.

There is no relation between this treatment by society and the outcome of these mothers' children. People tend to view all young mothers under the same stereotypical umbrella of doom. Believing that they don't know enough about life, love, or responsibilities. Though that may be true, there is no better way to learn these life lessons than parenthood.

Many young moms feel pressure to immerse themselves in work or school because society emits a sense that those achievements should be established prior to having children as a means of providing a "financially stable" environment. Studies show that many women who become mothers beforehand often do attain post-secondary education and careers like their counter-parts, only in a different order. Some even take on the position of juggling mother-hood, a job, and/or part or full time college or university life as single mothers. And thought they may struggle, they likely see more of the true value in things, and live within their means. However, the media and public fail to recognize these facts.

It isn't just education and careers that many young moms are believed to be lacking, a large majority are unmarried, and though some may be living common law, it is still perceived as one milestone that should be established before the conception, and birth of any children, even though 45% of Canadian marriages end in divorce.

Contrary to belief there are benefits to being a young mum. Conception, pregnancy, and childbirth have all been said to be easier. Birth defects and prenatal complications are at a lower rate. Post-pregnancy weight is shed faster, and 20 something moms seem to be more excepting of their new post-baby body (stretch marks and all) than 30 something moms. There is also much energy needed to take care of a newborn baby, and eventually, a toddler. Many older moms complain during pregnancy and beyond of fatigue, irritability, and decreased sex drive, and while moms still in their 20s do complain of the same symptoms, they seem to be much more mild in severity.

So next time you get "that look" at the grocery store, and feel guilty or less than sufficient, try and remember that you don't have to live up to their expectations of what a mother should look like, and that just because you have a child, that doesn't meant you will never accomplish anything, but that you completed the most important step first.