What's a Mom To Do?

One of the biggest decisions after your child is born is when, and if to go back to work or school. This self imposed question is often followed by many more. Who will watch the baby? How will I cope with being away, and missing special moments? How will the baby cope with being away from me? How much is it going to cost me?

Start off by asking yourself why you are considering returning to work or school.

For most, going back into the work force is a simple matter of finances. After the first year, maternity leave is no more if it were there in the first place, and this can put a strain on many families. Sometimes the stress of being financially inept, can make it an obligation. However, the cost of childcare today may make the idea of going back to work not as rosy as reality, and you may end up in the same economic situation you started in. There are government programs available to help pay for childcare costs which could help your family be more financially stable, less stressed and much more comfortable.

Some moms on the other hand feel obliged to return to work, because they believe their partners want them to do so. They may also be feeling that they are not contributing as much as their counterpart. Step back and have an eagle-eye view of what exactly you do manage in the home, and make a list, it's likely more than you think. You should also talk to your spouse, and find out what he thinks, he may rather that your child or children be with their mother in the comfort of their own home. You might be surprised, and this can help put your mind at ease. If you going back to work or school is what he really wants, then you can discuss your feelings with him, and come to an agreement out in the open. You could also look into working from home, there are companies who hire at home telephone sales agents (like ICT Group), and data entry employees, and though part time might be all you can manage, it might be just what you need. Starting your own business is also an option. Most everyone has a hobby (sewing, baking, painting, etc.) or one thing they are interested in, so go with it. It will help occupy your time and help you feel more self worth.

Pressure. Many moms, especially young ones, feel guilty because society seems to look down on young mothers who stay at home. If you let someone pressure you into doing something, like going back to school, you will undoubtedly drop the whole idea just as fast as you took it up because it truly isn't what you want. If you do want to get more education, try starting slow. You can take classes part time in the beginning and work your way up to a larger workload if you are enjoying it. You can also take correspondence courses from home, or sign on with an online recognized university (like Athabasca). If you prefer a classroom environment, starting part time, and gradually increasing it will be easier on both of you, rather than abruptly being away from one another for the entire day.

Your baby just isn't a baby anymore. One mom recently said that she isn't feeling very needed now that her daughter is getting well into her second year. If you are planning on having more children in the future, perhaps now is the time to expand your family. Another baby is sure to keep you busy, and they certainly are dependent. Experts say that children closer in age tend to have a stronger bond. Once your family is at your desired size, you could then begin taking classes part time, as previously stated, and then once your children are ready for kindergarten, you will be more comfortable with, and prepared to re-enter the work force or college/university environment.